Toast Master's and a job! By the way... HAPPY 1 MONTH ANNIVERSARY to me and Resveratrol!

I can't believe I'm writing a personal blog about my personal story and personal experiences regarding giving a personal speech in front of many people I do not personally know . But this is going to happen to me very soon, anyway. See, I'm about to sign up for Toast Masters. It's a club or organization that stresses (no pun intended) the importance and skills of public speaking. Well this is absolutely, so I've learned from yesterday's meeting, integral to my future and newly designed destiny. Not only necessary, but desired strongly by me!
I spoke for the first time in front of total strangers (didn't have to the first meeting but volunteered to do so) and I LOVED IT! I validate to you now, that I am Jason, but it has just been confirmed by doing this action that I am NOT the same person I used to be. This doesn't mean I have a new personality. It's just the all the fears and disfunction I had grown used to prior, were gone, thus allowing my true nature out to play!
And play is what I want to do now - in a productive, informative way, on stage, before as many people as possible, explaining my new way of life. I loved speaking. I thought I would, but I had no idea how powerful an experience it would be.
I'm not saying I wasn't nervous. Oh, I had anxiety. It would have been freakishly abnormal if I didn't. Public speaking in a number 1 fear of most people. If I felt total calm in my FIRST attempt in years, I'd have been a bit concerned.
No, I had a normal, healthy dose of nerves before and at the very beginning of my little 1 1/2 minute off the cuff speech. But the difference was I didn't let it control me. I acknowledged it, a cognitive behavioural approach learned many moons ago, and over came it. The longer I spoke, the more comfortable I became. EXCITING!!! And even more exciting was the revelation that I'd made at the second speech that night. I had even less anxiety already. In that short amount of time experiencing public speaking, I'd made a signifigant change toward improvement.
Now this also alludes to the fact that I almost won a little award for my participation and content. I was up against some tough competition in that room. Two men in particular were quite fantastic. They've been speaking with Toast Masters apparently for 7 years. But during award time for the evening, after handing the awards over to them, mentioned that it almost went to me too!
WOW. After years and years of no public speaking! I was really proud. Not arrogant. Modest but proud. It made me feel as though I really may have something special inside me to develop.
I have to hurry now, because I need to mow again - I try everyday the weather is nice, but I want to mention that all of this public speaking may come in handy if I get the job that I'd applied to yesterday at the college. It's a career counseling post that I stumbled across with my mom. I don't fit the total criteria in experience or education, however, I wrote an exemplary cover letter that may have gotten my foot in the door. It would be a couple of months before the job become available but I really, now, feel I have something special to offer these kids. And it's of course a good thing that it's a ways off considering it allows more time to make sure the Resveratrol is working before committing to a job.
I am so thrilled be in this position in life only 1 month after taking my first Resveratrol pill. Thank you to the makers of it and I have to thank myself for being tenacious through those difficult years. It's paid off.
Talk soon!